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Classic Wings Magazine WWII Naval Aviation Research Pacific Luftwaffe Resource Center
When Hollywood Ruled The Skies - Volumes 1 through 4 by Bruce Oriss


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 6:44 pm 
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Poor ol' Gary had a terrible bout of headaches for years, and they were just getting worse and worse. So, he went finally went to the doctor to see what the problem was.

The doctor said, "Gary, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. And unfortunately the only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."

Gary was both shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. Ultimately though, he realized that he had no choice but to go under the knife.

When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he couldn't help but feeling like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person altogether. He then decided that he could make a new beginning and live a new life.


He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need... A new suit."

He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see.......size 44 short."
Gary laughed and said, "Wow! That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.
Gary tried on the suit and it fit perfectly.

As Gary admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?"
Gary thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."
The salesman eyed Gary and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck."
Again, Gary was surprised and said, "That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years," said the elderly old tailor.
Gary tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly.


Gary walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear as well?"
Gary thought for a moment and said, "Sure."
The salesman said, "Let's see.......... size 36, right?"
Gary laughed and exclaimed, "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old."


The salesman shook his head, "There's no way you could wear a size 34 in underwear. A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."


Gary fainted.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 14, 2009 9:50 pm 
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JESUS!

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 15, 2009 8:16 am 
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Ouch!


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 4:23 am 
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I do believe I'd show up at that doctor's office the next day with a carving knife... :)

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 2:26 pm 
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:shock:
:lol: :lol: :lol: Good one!

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 8:05 pm 
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Sounds like this Gary must work for the FAA, he knows something is wrong, but does not have the faintest idea of how to fix it

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 18, 2009 8:36 pm 
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Matt Gunsch wrote:
Sounds like this Gary must work for the FAA, he knows something is wrong, but does not have the faintest idea of how to fix it


Nope. Still unemployed. But you did describe a typical day in the life of Gary, that's for sure.

Gary


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