T'was the Night Before Christmas at VFM by Jim S.T'was the night before Christmas, and all through the museum
Not even a mosquito was stirring, although you can
never see 'em.
The flight controls, propellers and engines all hung
from the Counter-Invader with care
In hopes that Special Kay would soon take to the air.
The volunteers all snug in their beds
While visions of low passes at Oshkosh danced in
their heads
Chuckie in her kerchief and Crazy Sally in her cap
But JR went to bed early-he was in no mood for
crap.
While out on 38th street, there arose such a clatter,
Chuck sprang from his sleeping pallet to see what
was the matter.
Away to the window he flew like a flash
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash
When what to his wondering mechanic's eyes did
appear,
but a big Deuce and a Half filled with ordnance, guns
and beer!
With a profile commanding an impressive display,
Chuck knew in a moment the truck was driven by the
spirit of General Curtis E. LeMay!
More rapid than commandos, Chuck's mechanic brothers
they came
Old Iron A$$ whistled and shouted and called them
by name
"Now Arnold, now Inu, now Manning, Shimko and
Dave. On Lefty, on Arber, on Cayla, Caleb and Ray"
Head over with these weapons and hang 'em on Kay!
Larry texted Stan on a hunch,
But alas Stan wouldn't be there to help until lunch
"Load up the .50's, napalm, iron bombs, rockets
and more!
Now dash away, dash away, its cold in here so close
that d____ hangar door!"
As Jim sat in the cockpit and Rand turned around
Up the rickety maintenance stand came Old Iron A$$
with a bound
He had an intense face and a little round belly
That shook when he yelled " Slap on that f-ing air
scoop-use more petroleum jelly!"
He eyed the crew with a wary smile and a waive of his
smoldering stogie,
"You boys are no spring chickens,
But a pretty capable looking bunch of old fogies."
His butt was chubby and plump, a right jovial old elf
and I had to Laugh when I saw him in spite of
myself!
The volunteers spoke not a word but went straight
About the task
They hung the guns and ordnance and no one sat on
their a$$.
And laying a finger aside of his nose and giving a
nod, up the rickety old step ladder he rose.
Curtis spoke not a word, but went straight to work
Loading the gun bays with belts of .50 caliber bullets,
then he turned with a jerk
As the hydraulic mule sprang into life with a roar,
away flew Chuck and Tim to rig the left main gear
doors.
Finally, I heard LeMay exclaim as his Deuce rumbled
out of sight-
"Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!"