Spitfire Still In Limbo
WASHINGTON. D.C.. The blocked export of a vintage Supermarine Spitfire TR9 to New Zealand turned into a political football today, with Presidential hopefuls weighing into the debate.
Senator Hillary Clinton pointed to the economic impact of the sale. “Exporting goods and having foreign money flow into the country, and into the pockets of everyday Americans, is no way to run a country,” states Clinton. “Our whole way of life is based on importing goods made in other countries and sending our money overseas so that others get the benefit. If we started selling things to other countries it would affect our international trade figures. It would impact our Balance of Payments.”
Senator Barack Obama took a similar view in a speech to Ohio democrats. He declared, “If we started selling things to other countries it would affect our international trade figures. It would impact our Balance of Payments. What do you mean, somebody else already said that. Are you accusing me of plagiarism?”
Senator John McCain also admired the grace and performance of the Spitfire. “I’d like to buy it myself,” he told reporters in Texas, “But because I am not getting your tax dollars from the FEC it will have to wait until I become President.”
Former Presidential hopeful Rudy Giuliani issued a statement which says “Remember Nine-Eleven!”
President George W Bush explained the stance of the current administration. “I would like to clarify that a Spitfire is a single seater. Normally a single seater. With only one person flying it. But this one has two seats. That’s nearly twice as many. Obviously that’s a threat. With two seats this Spitfire has double the deadly-ality
[sic] of a normal Spitfire.”
“We don’t want any US manufactured military aircraft to be sold to anybody outside the US military,” clarified US Secretary of Defense Robert Gates, speaking from India where he is negotiating the sale of 65 Boeing F/A-18E/F Super Hornets to the Indian Navy. "Although this is a British design, this particular aircraft was assembled in the United States."
Australian Defense officials are also nervously watching developments. The proposed retirement of the F-111 fleet, the delays in the Wedgetail and JSF projects, and the controversial rushed purchase of F/A-18 Super Hornets by the previous Government has brought greater focus on regional air defense capabilities. “Our focus was on our northern neighbors, with their MiGs and Suhkois, stated Defense Minister Joel Fitzgibbon. “But the importation of a Spitfire into New Zealand represents a significant increase in the combat capability of that country. While we would still outnumber them two airworthy Spitfires to one, the fact that they would have a two-seater TR9 means that the same number of aircrew from each country would be in the air at the same time."
However it is emerging that the export of military technology may not the key issue behind the delays. Top military strategist Homer Simpson disagrees that the action to block the export is related to weapons and proliferation. “New Zealand currently manufactures Spitfire components,” states Springfield resident Simpson. “It assembles, certifies and tests airworthy Spitfires, as evidenced by Spitfire MkVb BL628 which recently imported
from New Zealand. It makes no sense to stop an export to a country that has the means and ability to manufacture the goods domestically. It is not decision that a rational person would make, so that means it’s political.”
Various Government departments are queuing up to get their names in the press concerning this issue.
The Federal Aviation Administration issued this statement. “We take our responsibilities to the traveling public and the taxpayer very seriously. As this particular aircraft is fitted with a second cockpit, we have been forced to classify it as a passenger aircraft. In order to protect the traveling public we are required to place an Air Marshall on every flight. As you would expect, this is an onerous and unpopular assignment, so every Air Marshall will be rotated through this duty. This is expected to take 10 years and cost $8.6m dollars. We will be fighting any export while this challenge remains incomplete.”
The US Navy clarified it’s stance on the matter with a posting on it’s website. “Flying airplanes around in the sky is no way to preserve aviation heritage. Historical and significant aircraft should be securely stored in 300 feet of salt water, and vigorous legal action taken to ensure they remain there.”
Others have also noted its value as a historical artifact. A Fox News publicist is quoted as saying "I've been told that the biggest user of this mark of Spitfire was Ireland. Any television journalist will tell you that the battle between the Irish Republican Army and the Romans at Gettysburg was the most significant aerial conflict in World War 1. Pressure is rising for this airplane to be placed in a national collection within the US."
Canadian aviation heritage enthusiasts are also fighting the export. While this particular aircraft was not built in Canada, was never used in Canada, and was not operated by Canadian armed forces, vintage aircraft fans claim that some Canadian enthusiasts once saw this aircraft at an air show and are demanding that the Canadian Government seize it so that it can be donated free to their local museum.
Some New Zealand residents are also up in arms about the potential arrival. An Ardmore resident who did not want to be identified because they feared being labeled as stupid stated “When I bought my house next to the airport I didn’t expect to have to listen to aircraft taking off and landing. Now they want to bring in another plane that has a noisy engine. Who in their right mind wants to hear a Rolls Royce Merlin doing a low pass followed by a zoom climb, wing-over, low circuit, fighter approach, go around and full power climb out. Not me, that’s for sure!”
More news as it comes to hand.
END.
Unfortunately it looks like it might not make it to Wanaka.
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I was taking that seriously for the first line
